black art 2

Melancholy & Memories

Forever wasn’t long enough
To love her like she deserved.
I had intended to do more than try.
She was the best part
Of my sorry little life,
Now I miss her everyday.

I walked out of an interview
Feeling dejected and confused,
My next move unsure.
Before heading home
To my untidy apartment,
I felt the need to clear my head.

On a park bench, I lay down
And began to order my thoughts
But everything was a distraction.
The joggers and dog walkers,
Yoga groups and bicycler’s and
The loud laughing fun seekers.

They all seemed so happy,
While I felt lost in the grey cloud
Of a deep set melancholy.
I got up and went home
Before the tears spilled out,
Cleaning up to loud music.

That’s why I didn’t hear
The banging on the door,
Or noticed she’d barged in.
Dancing into the living room
In my boxers and sweating,
I froze when I saw her.

Before I could ask what the hell,
She threatened to kick my ass.
Speechless, I covered my man parts.
Storming out she slammed the door,
Still standing there like an idiot
I laughed, then finished up quietly.

While cooking dinner
With the music playing low,
I tried to recall what she had said.
I could only think of how
This stranger saw me in my drawers
Dancing like a damn fool.

The next interview went well
And landed me a  nice job.
I realized she lived in my building.
Seeing her in passing at first
Was unnerving, until we learnt
We moved in the same crowd.

Who though that us both,
Not so young, but free and single
Would be great for each other.
It didn’t take long for us
To agree that they were right,
And we dated for a while.

Between the long work hours
And the studying for degrees,
We loved and supported each other.
But one car wreck changed all that.
Feeling like a helpless man,
Wishing my love could mend her.

When she fell into a coma,
The decisions made by her family
Politely excluded considering me.
They decided to pull the plug.
I never attended the funeral,
Or packed away her belongings.

As a man I was too furious,
And by losing her, was too broken
To think in any rational terms.
Left with only a few months
Of memories to preserve,
Our tiny fraction of time together.

Ria 2016